winterizedt51b:

the reason why the smugglers in star wars are the good guys and the bounty hunters are the bad guys is bc ppl who rebel against authority are dope and ppl who help the cops are lame

teenagerposts:

the fray: where did i go wrong….. i lost a friend…..  somewhere along in the bitterness….. and i would have stayed up with you all night……  had i known how to save a life……

12 year old me:

schwerdistheword:

squalos-vois:

imagine laying in bed and instead of pulling on your legs or whatever, a demon straight up just smacks your ass

I mean
What’s the demon look like

raitosrolex:

I have a disease that makes me like vampires and titties its callled being a fucking genius

vethox:

I’m constantly torn between “if it’s meant to be, it will be” and “if you want it, go and get it.”

serotnin:

catch me gardening topless at 5am telling my baby tomato plant about my bad dream

sleepythug:

me: bein alone not that bad, im coo 

me: *spots happy couple on bus all snuggily*

arabwife:

i like being alone but i want someone to be alone with, if that makes sense

sonnywortzik:

getting spoken to as if i’m straight by straight people who assume everyone is straight, subsequently feeling like the world’s most useless and irritated secret agent

cowbellguy:

Hand jobs and blow jobs are called jobs because they’re tedious and dicks are gross. Going down on a girl is called eating out because it’s a privilege.

ensyme:

my American gf: pound me
me: what’s that in metric